First let me say that I couldn't have planned the timing of my vacation any better. I hear you had a lot of snow while I was gone? Grocery store roofs collapsing, WSU closed, 6 hours shoveling snow off driveways! But when I drive home...it is all melting; Seems I brought some warm weather back with me!
Second, I would like to give a shout out to my new friends in Walla Walla! I will write about my visit with the Walla Walla Chamber and Canoe winery later.
Now, let's get crazy like the Kiwis!
Cement Luge. Check it out! You have to do this and be careful to not hit the little children on the way down. Instead, aim for the screaming adult female...as my highly competitive traveling partner did. Here's the scene. You wait patiently in line with a hundred kids, sprinkle in some parents and Asian tourists.
NOTE: Not all Asian tourists in NZ are tourists...they are Kiwis! As my mother says, "Koreans are everywhere. I am not surprised. Kiwis need Kim chi too!"
Grap your black, three wheeled, motor less cart. Prove to the 16 year old safety guard that you know how to use the brakes...shimmy your way to one of three lanes; scenic, intermediate, advanced and GO!
Scenic was nice and....scenic. Took a long time and this is where most of the parents with kids on their laps drive. Weaving in and out of them was a breeze! Ha Ha Suckers! Intermediate was a nice test of your new driving skills...just don't let go of the handles or your cart brakes COLD and you go flying. Didn't happen to me but I was told it does sometimes. Advanced: Now we're talkin! I totally kicked some 5year old's butt on this run! You should have seen him screaming at me! Let off the break little dude and you MIGHT catch up!
Then you take a ski lift all the way up the mountain to do it again. This time I would race my friends down the advance. I was in second place...passing my HIGHLY COMPETETIVE TRAVEL PARTNER, who will be known as Jerk for the rest of this blog. There I was, spotting the end...going for the silver when I look behind me and see Jerk speeding up. He ignored the SLOW DOWN NOW sign because, well, let's be honest! It's like a red light in Italy - a suggestion.
Here comes Jerk and the lanes are merging and BAM! He squeezes me out of the lane! I am ejected from my cart and forced to use my bum as the brakes!
I got back in the saddle and limped my way to the finish line. I was laughing because it must have been a ridiculous site. Jerk was mortified when I showed him my raspberry. Then he felt so bad...I milked it the whole rest of the trip! I won't tell you how I scraped the same spot while riding the SCENIC luge; no one to blame for that but myself!
On to ZORB: This is where they throw you in a plastic, human sized, hamster ball and push you down a hill! GREAT FUN! I highly recommend you try this with water. When I did it there was a water shortage at the site. (Global issue huh?) So I did the dry run and that was fun...but the water allows more people in the ball with you! On second thought that could mean elbow in the face and after the luge I am done bleeding.
Then Swing Catapult! Good rush!
Then Rally Car Race. Am I tired? NO! But I have to admit that I cried in the rally car because the driver was insane. Which must be the point.
NOTE: Idaho farm boys have learned a variety of ways to entertain themselves with speed, engines and B.B. guns. Give them a bike, a cliff and near death experience and you have a friend for life.
When it was my turn to drive an evil sensation swept over me as I gained speed. I felt the inner Sue-animal emerge! I am gonna make this Sucker CRY!!! And I detected a wee little tear as he learned I had the fastest overall time! He may have had the fastest LAP but technique ruled the race that day!
Cave tubing was amazing! The 16 year old guide (they have a lot of them employed here) gave us directions.
Kiwi: Yeah. All right everyone. I'm Chris that that guy over theh is Mike. Give a wave Mike. Yeah. Uh. Mike doesn’t like you to pee in the wet suits. It's very bad smell and hard to clean. Right Mike? Yeah. See he's noddin yeah. So please do not pee in your wetsuit. The pee will be trapped in and you will essentially be marinated in your own urine. Not very appealin.
We were off! Glow worms are really cannibalistic mosquito grubs with glowing poop. But that is not as cute as GLOW WORM! They are beautiful and all activities at the Waitomo caves are highly recommended! After the 2 hour caving/tubing/water jumping run you get a hot shower and soup!
Geothermal parks are everywhere and a must see. In some parts of Rotorura the Earth let's you know she's alive with her perfume sulfur scent and steam. I was in awe of the mineral pools, lakes and streams. The variety of colors - gold, highlighter yellow, sky blue, Ana Sui Spring collection 2002 green, and the mud! How the mud bubbles up and farts! So many giggles and thoughts of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory!
The landscape of New Zealand is both romantic Jane Austen novel, Jurrassic Park 1 and yes...Lord of the Rings. I am at a loss for words.
The fish and chips in NZ were delicious! Last year a student got scurvy because he only ate fish and chips. Cheap and good...why blame him? Guess he didn't like tomato sauce (ketchup in Kiwi talk with a clove flavor). When I asked the fish and chips guy what oil he used for frying he looked at me like I was strange.
"Beef" the man said.
"I love your country Sir! I'll take the number 2!"
